Trident: From The Chronicles of Trevelion Jamerton Cornelius Augustus Adams III
I thought I would share a fun vignette of flash fiction written a while ago, penned from the perspective of inanimate objects created by the inventor Trevelion Jamerton Cornelius Augustus Adams the Third. A special thanks to Pan D MacCauley (@maccauley_d) who came up with the premise of this fun romp of fantasy. Hope you all enjoy it 😀
Trident
“Here you go, your majesty, may I present your new and improved scepter?” My creator handed me over to the king, while he and his assistant were prostrated on their knees before him.
“Dude! Why are you so chill about all of this? We find the fabled lost city of Atlantis, with its inhabitants alive and well, and you do not even break a sweat over it…Are you even human?!” The inventor’s assistant whispered over to him in a shaky voice, after the ruler of the lost city accepted his gift.
“Quiet, Timothy! Show some tact while in the presence of royalty, such uncouth behavior will only serve to embarrass us.” The assistant gawked at the inventor—slack jawed but quiet—while the king inspected me.
“You have done a mighty fine job, my friend.” His royal highness of the seven seas nodded his approval of the improvements the inventor had made in my design. “But what are these buttons and dials for?” The inventor got up from his knees and approached the king.
“Well, your majesty…is it alright if I call you Bob? That is your given name, correct?” The king made an acquiescing gesture in response to his request. The man who brought sentience into my being proceeded to point out my various components and functions. “Well, Bob, these buttons over here activate a series of high intensity laser beams emitted from any of the three prongs at the end of your staff. And you can adjust the strength of each ray to either survey or stun your target.”
“Suppose I want to obliterate whatever stands before me?”
“I am a man who believes in civil discourse and comradery, Bob. I find unnecessary violence abhorrent to the senses. It should have been left back in the days of our ancestors, hunting about on the prairies like wild beasts. But I do understand, that as leader of your kingdom, you do have a need to protect yourself and your loved ones. So, the vaporization setting will be decided by the trident itself, after evaluating the situation on survey mode. It’s either that, or you could simply get a little stabby with it.” The inventor shrugged. “Oh, and now, it also has the intelligence and discretionary capacity to consult with you on any matter you see fit!”
“Interesting.” His majesty rolled me over in his fingers a few times. Occasionally giving me a tap on the palm of his hand; to test my durability, I supposed. “And what about this button over here?”
“It’s a dispenser for fish-flavored gum.” The inventor pressed the button, which revealed a tiny compartment where the base of my staff separated into its golden toothy design, and a rectangular piece of hardened sap protruded from it. The nobleman took it and chewed the piece of gum with a look of satisfaction.
“Did you really turn the king of Atlantis’ scepter into a gum dispensing laser gun?” The inventor’s assistant muttered to himself as he shook his head in disbelief.
“Quiet, Timothy!” The inventor hissed at him, but a smile continued to adorn his rugged features while he waited for his majesty’s approval of me.
